The Power of Intentions in the New Year

Many years at this time, I’ve set out to make a list of resolutions. Resolutions never did work for me, due to the underlying belief there was something wrong with who I’d been and what I’d experienced to that point. Life needs no remedies, we experience what we need to. This year I will begin with a list of intentions. Intentions have the energy of creation within them as well as trust in a divine plan.

In 2012, at the New Moon, I began the process of setting my intentions for the Lunar Cycle. It amazed me how much I was able to manifest when clearly defining a desired outcome without attempting to prescribe the vehicle in which it occurred. We are powerful co-creators of our lives. Positive energy, gratitude, and receptivity will always bring us what we need. Negative energy, feelings of lack, and blockages will bring us that which we least desire.

Here are but a few of my 2013 Intentions:
* Learn lessons in life through joy and abundance
* Maintain integrity to myself and others
* Welcome and accept all people, relationships, opportunities that are aligned with my commitment to making a beautiful life with my child.
* Simply, trust, even more.
* Pursue my dreams with an inner harmony of optimism, fearlessness, and detachment.

I would absolutely love to hear from you what your Intentions are for this New Year. And, feel free to share here in this growing community your New Moon Intentions as well. I’ll be posting gentle reminders to aim for the stars about a week earlier with astrological notes for each New Moon in 2013.

Bonne Annee!
Akemashite Omedetou Gozaimasu!
Feliz Ano Nuevo!

Finding Intuition

Intuition is one of those gifts that all sentient beings share: humans, animals, dare I say plants and trees? I do, friends, I do. Spend enough time in the great outdoors, and you become connected to everything, breathing in the pulse and rhythm of the land, air, and water around you, underfoot. It is a simple way to become grounded, rooted to a greater sense of purpose, while simultaneously so relaxed and at ease that the mind-chatter begins to quiet until you no longer have a thought. You are a living, breathing, connected being – and you are more aware than at most times of your environment within and without. The key difference, is that your ego has left the building, taken a hiatus, a nap at worst – a sabbatical at best; and you have come to realize that Descartes had it all wrong when he went on about, “I think, therefore I am”.

Many adults forget the vivid details of their childhoods, those Technicolor fantasies of newly created worlds and kingdoms made with each time at play; only to be altered and improved again the next time. Perhaps it is my own deep connection to my childhood, to the trees I spent my formative years playing in and the wilds I ran through, that has helped me retain my own colorful imagination. If you have lost your own sense of imagination, or are a “grown-up” I strongly encourage you to spend time with a child in your family playing a game with no rules *gasp* just. for. fun. If you haven’t any children in your life yet, then get yourself a bicycle and cruise – don’t just commute. Get a hula hoop and go for it baby! Dance like a jive turkey because it’s a riot and laughter is great for the soul. Break out some art supplies and get messy, not pretty.

Intuition is intrinsically tied to our imaginations – which is why children, with their expansive, finely tuned imaginations, so often have a sixth sense about things. The trick with intuition, in any of its forms (clairvoyance, clairsentience, clairaudience, etc.), is that it feels┬ájust like imagination. Trusting yourself and being completely receptive is key. With all forms of intuition, there’s a five-second rule (ya know, just like the rule applicable to food falling on the ground?); you’ve got 5 seconds to receive and let go of the information before your intellect starts to analyze it and make a mess of it.

So what are you waiting for, star-dust? Have some fun, play with the world, and start imagining more. Your intuition will thank you (not to mention your peace of mind). Added bonus: your confidence will grow and trusting your self, listening to your inner wisdom – it all comes that much easier.

The Anatomy of an Apology

It’s definitely not a competition, so let’s not take the spirit of this quote the wrong way. Apologizing isn’t about being “first” at anything – if that’s your intention or motivation, be sure to follow-up with me next post on forgiveness. And, if it is, you’re human – it’s a certitude that there are times, particularly when dealing with someone who’s just completely burned you – that ‘killing them with kindness’ is all too tempting. But let’s face it, ‘killing them with kindness’ is a dolled-up way of reciprocating the dickheadedness. So, that we’re all in honest agreement – and on the same page about that bullshit – I’ll get on with the Anatomy of an Apology.

Apologizing is, for the most part, in our culture, a hollow act. Sorry if that’s offensive (see what I mean? I’m not sorry at all…); but it’s completely true. Children are raised to apologize for developmentally appropriate behavior before they are developmentally even able to empathize. A true apology, in its sincerest form, comes from the ability to empathize with the one we’ve slighted, offended, or outright been a douchetard to – and say we’re sorry. Of course, my bright readers, friends, and clients – you know this. But wait, there’s MORE!

An evolved apology looks something like the above. It isn’t about who is right/wrong – or weighing in on the douchetard heavyweight scale. You know you’ve reached a level of maturation and generosity of spirit when you’re above that – because you truly do value your relationship more than your own ego. This is the point at which you are a collaborator, a problem-solver, and focused on a greater good than being the ‘winner’. And, I know, dear readers, friends, and lovely clients – that you already have been here too. You’re so fucking awesome!

When I read the second sentence of this image above, this is where there’s something missing, in my experience. I combed the inspirational boards on Pinterest, weheartit, etc. (frankly, my search for a visual representation of the kind of forgiveness I want to share with you was exhaustive) to no avail. Here’s the reframe:

“It just means you value your relationship with your self, more than your ego” ~ Tara Michelucci

That’s my spin on it folks. You are SO much more than the mind-chatter going on inside, you are more than the sum of your experiences, you are more than your ego. I’m sure many of you have lovely egos – you probably work at keeping it healthy and have a loving relationship with it. And that there is my point. A dysfunctional ego (which we all have, it’s a matter of reigning it in, and working with it), is the root of our problems. So when you apologize, let your motivation be empathy, creative solutions and cooperation, and always, always – strengthening the relationship between your Self and your ego.

Furthermore, when you do apologize, with all of those beautiful motivations and juicy rewards – understand that your apology is independent of forgiveness from anyone other than your Self. And, since you are already apologizing – you have express forgiveness from your Self. Not everyone is going to forgive you when you apologize. That doesn’t make your apology less worthy, nor does it make them less worthy of receiving the apology.

Like I said, we have all been conditioned with some fundamentally dysfunctional, illogical, and flat-out erroneous concepts of the apology/forgiveness exchange. That’s my breakdown of the Anatomy of an Apology – in it’s most intentional, healthiest form. Next topic, Forgiveness.

In the meantime: What are your ideas about apologizing? How does it work/not work for you? I would love to know your experiences with apologizing – both successes and “failures”.